|v/a| "Something Weird: Hey Folks! It's Intermission Time!" [Brown Vinyl]

Welcome to the sweet-but-savory, suspiciously sticky, and slightly sinful world of old-school movie theater intermission messages. It’s where big-band jazz, psychedelic rock, sequin-bedecked disco, virgin vanilla orchestrated pop, and more are pressed into service, with your satisfaction as the solitary goal.

Thirsty? A jumping jazz trio backs jazz/pop singer Joanie Sommers (famous for her ‘62 hit “Johnny Get Angry”) on the standard “Makin’ Whoopee” with lyrics revamped to turn you on to the sparkling taste of Pepsi. A hipster from an animated, Paul Klee-gone-bebop tableaux slings beatnik proto-rap in service of Dr. Pepper. An ode to Orange Crush goes down easy amid hip-swiveling piano licks.

Hungry? “Let’s All Go to the Lobby” is the theme from the Citizen Kane of intermission films, preserved in the Library of Congress’s National Film Registry. The classic '50s clip features animated treats crooning award-winning soundtrack composer Jack Tillar's snack-bound song, which borrows liberally from “For He’s a Jolly Good Fellow.” Hey, are we crazy or does candy singing about the consumption of candy smack just a wee bit of cannibalism?

Just imagine—what if the explosion of multicolored madness you encounter in this alternate dimension were the fabric of your everyday existence? What if candy-counter expeditions and popcorn pop music were the news of the day and your world had a warm, woozy 35 mm blur and a dream-state sugar rush? It’s a tantalizing notion. For starters, here’s your soundtrack.